....Gotta Make the Salsa....

.....Gotta Make the Salsa....

Ive been making salsa for a long long time now, and it's taken years for "my" salsa to hit full stride. What's really made the difference is watching everybody else make it. I've worked with a lot of people who love to break out the salsa at pretty much every occasion, so I've had the privilege of spying on a lot of different salsas in progress.
I've seen everything used: bad tomatoes, good tomatoes, canned tomatoes, corn, beans, all the way up to a salsa I witnessed, made almost entirely of habanero chiles.....le'me tell you that was an extraordinary experience; but not one I'll be repeating anytime soon.
Just for a good starting off point I'll talk about plain ol' salsa. I've learned from living in a land that offers so much bounty....and yet so little, that I've got to take great care in choosing my "maters". So much in fact that I usually skip fresh tomatoes all together and opt for the canned variety. Sad huh? You get through one day at a time. But given its still summer and the tomatoes are looking pretty good right now, we'll include them in the party for now.

***Ingredients***

2 each-- Fresh Tomatoes. Large ones. And dont be afraid to grab ripe ones. Really ripe. Like, dont buy them to far in advance, ripe. They'll lend more flavor to the salsa. Chop them up really good, and lift the chopped tomato out of the mess of juice and seeds that have accumulated. More to help lose the seeds than anything.



3/4 cup--Canned crushed tomatoes. This delivers on some extra tomato flavor, that our poor American tomatoes tend to be missing.



1/2 cup-- Tomato juice. You can save what came from your tomatoes, but I reccomend cocktail...or V8. Thats got more outside flavors than some people like, but it works for me.



1 each-- Jalapeno. Chop it up very well. If you or yours are too timid, then you might first cut around the seeds and remove them. Do this carefully, and wash every thing you touch...hell everything you look at while youre dealing with the jalapeno. You will never get a better lesson in cross-contamination than you will when dealing with hot chiles. Wash everything, including and especially your hands.....twice.



1 each--Red Onion. Minced very small.



1 each--Large clove of Garlic. Find something heavy and sturdy. Now smash that clove of garlic like.....well something you would smash. Then continue by chopping it until its suitably fine enough.



1/2 cup-- Cilantro, chopped rough



1/2 cup--Lime juice. Thats maybe 6 limes or so, depending on your extracting abilities. This for me is what really makes the difference. A good salsa should be quite acidic.



1/2 teaspoon-- Ground Cumin. This also really perks the salsa up and adds those expected mexican flavors.

***End Note***

By now I'm kind of lost for words, though. Theres not much more to tell. This salsa is just as simple as that. Matter of fact if you've been putting everything you've prepared so far into the same bowl, then all you've got left to do is stir. Season it with a few big pinches of salt and maybe a shot of olive oil to help carry the flavors. But that's all there is to it. Let it sit in the fridge for a couple of hours and it shall marinate all those wonderful flavors together.

Chicken Lo Mein: The Un-Recipe

Chicken Lo Mein: The Un-Recipe

So it's like this: I don't really write too many recipes. Usually when I do write them, it tends to be a memory issue. I've lost too many recipes over the years, simply due to the errosion of my own brain so my recipes are little more than notes or reminders about a dish or a sauce. They never look like the recipes we're all used to reading. So when my sister asked me thru Facebook to give her a recipe for Chicken Lo Mein I didnt know what to say. Stir frys and the like are always the most ridiculous to write recipes for; usually because it's a dozen seperate ingredients bound for the wok, followed by another dozen to make a wonderfully complex sauce to bind it all with.
Well in that sense I'm happy to report that this is going to be little else, but I will do my best to coach you thru how to make this. Im gonna give you a list of Ingredients-like I said-that are bound for the wok......yes you need one. With all the money youre about to spend buying a bunch of food items that probably arent on your normal grocery list; you can afford to make the one time investment. And chances it will be a one time investment. My mother is still using the wok she bought when I was in grade school; but that aside:

***The Ingredients***

*Chicken. The cheaper the better. Most stir fry you will ever eat has been made with as little of the cheapest meat available. Its good but its not important to the dish. Cut it into thin pieces or strips. Then just to save us both time, go ahead and poach the chicken off in chicken stock. Store bought, base, bouillion, or homemade, it doesnt matter. Once the chicken is cooked almost completely remove it and set it aside to cool. Save about 2 Cups of that chicken stock though. We'll need it for the sauce.

* Oil. I'll talk about Sesame Oil later, but it's only for flavor. For an actual cooking medium you'll want something like canola or safflower oil. Something that can handle the high heat.

*Cabbage. Good ol' regular green cabbage. Shredded.
--This is why I'm not giving you amounts for these things. Because after you prepare your initial stir-fry, you'll have lots of stir fry ingredients leftover. All of them will hold in your fridge perfectly, waiting to jump in and be a part of a fresh stirfry. Or cook it all at once if you dare, cause we all know how good those chinese take out leftovers are. But I reccomend small batches.

*Onions. White or yellow, whichevers cheaper. A good medium sized dice will work, since they cook so fast.

*Carrot. Peel and julienned or sliced very thin so they'll cook in the short amout of time they'll be in the wok.........yes, you need one!!!

*Zucchini. Not important but nice. Quarter it lengthwise and cut out the spongy seed material in the middle. I always do this with Zuccs cause that stuff cooks so much fast and when it does get cooked it promptly turns to slime. Once the seed material is gone, slice thin.

*Bean Sprouts. Theyre called Mung Bean sprouts, officially. If you can find them great. If theyre fresh and crisp, not wilted or slimy, thats even better!! And you dont have to do anything to them but sprinkle them on at the end

*Snow Peas. Just like the sprouts, make sure theyre nice.

*Other ingredients of note that might make this dish happier would include chow mein noodles, water chestnuts, and bamboo shoots. They all come in cans and theyre perfectly acceptable. But if they're wet, drain them well.

*The Noodles. The American grocery store has definitely gone through a lot of changes in the last 5 years or so. More and more interesting ingredients are becoming available to a lot of cooks. But in the off chance that youre stranded in the middle of nowhere, theres no Asian Market, and your grocery store doesnt even carry soy sauce; try using fettucini or linguini.....or hell even spaghetti will work. Just cook normally, rinse and cool. You can even skip a step and once cool toss it liberally with dark sesame oil. This stuff will really help to add accent flavor to the final dish. Sesame oil is like Extra Virgin Olive Oil. By that I mean, don't cook with it. Its not built for the heat and it breaks down at a relatively low temperature; but it's got great flavor.

*Finally theres one more ingredient to have on stand-by. I'm not even sure if it has a name. Its not an ingredient, by a mixture. An Aromatic Mixture is what I'll call it. Take 5 cloves of garlic, about the same amount of fresh ginger peeled, and 3 Green Onions cut into 1 inch pieces. Pulse those together in your food processor....or just whack away at them with a knife(so-to-speak)until you have made not quite a paste. Set that aside. Protect it. It makes a world of difference.

--I said that was the final ingredient, but that's not entirely accurate. Its not even partly accurate. Theres a few more ingredients, and they come together to form the final ingredient.

***The Sauce***

I wanted this Lo Mein to have a distinct sauce much like the "Wonderful" Chinese food I remember. Ordinarily I'd add a little white pepper and soy sauce to a bit of slightly thickened chicken stock and be done with it. But that wasn't theirs. Theirs was something different. And while I know I'm probably way off track, this should be delicious nontheless.

2 c Chicken Stock, fortified from poaching your chicken, right?
1-4 DeArbol or Japonese Chiles, crumbled. How hot do you want it?
1/4c Rice Wine Vinegar, or Regular Vinegar diluted with a little water
2 T Brown Sugar, packed
1/3 c Soy Sauce
1/4 c White Wine
2T Fish Sauce, Try you damnest to find it. Gourmet stores, specialty food sections, asian markets. It stinks like hell, but it makes things taste like heaven. Think Asian Worcestershire sauce. But if you can't find it, dont bother trying to replace it. Nothing works; at least nothing you're gonna be able to find.
1/2 t White Pepper, you just need it.
2-4 T Cornstarch(right before you need it mix it well with enough cold water to make it look like cream)

--Bring all these ingredients to a simmer as you stir well to mix them. When a boil is achieved, prepare your cornstarch and wisk it in a little at a time; allowing the sauce to return to a boil after each addition of starch. But beware that you might not need the entire amount of cornstarch. In fact you shouldnt. You really dont want the sauce to be thick. Just enough so, that it coats the stir fry ingredients.
--A good thickness test is to dip a spoon into the sauce, remove it, and run your finger down the back of the spoon. It should leave a trail that isnt immediately covered by the liquid. And beware that the sauce will thicken more as it stands, but that will be an advantage in the end.
--Set the sauce aside and be ready to dump it into the overall stirfry.

***Go For a Wok***

--Seriously, you need one!!! Hopefully we've already cooked our chicken and its sitting pretty. This has made our sauce richer and more flavorful and its also gonna make this a lot easier since we don't have to begin with the long cooking protein. So heat your WOK over high heat. Add a couple tablespoons of oil to the wok, not a whole lot. If your walk is hot enough the oil should begin shimmering right away; at which time you should carefully add a heaping spoonful of your aromatic mixture and begin mixing it in with a large wooden spoon...............and I'm gonna stop here for a minute........cause you may have already burned the crap out of your aromatic mixture before you have time to get to any of your other ingredients.
--So I should explain the secret to stir fry. Theres a funny story as to how I learned the secret to stir fry. Maybe I'll tell it someday. Long story short though, you have to move fast! Thats the whole idea. The food really should never sit still, because the wok should never be cool enough to allow the food to sit still. Meaning your wok should be so hot that if you dont stir it almost constantly it will burn. So move fast and have all of your ingredients prepared and ready and sitting neatly close by. Because once something needs to go in, in needs to go in NOW. Even have your serving dish handy because when the stir fry is done, it shouldnt stay in the wok to continue cooking..
--So stir like crazy when you dump in your aromatic mixture. It will burn quite fast, but if youre ready you can prevent that by goin ahead and throwing in your onion, carrot, zucchini, and cabbage. And as far as ingredient amounts go.....it's your stir fry. Add stuff in by the handful or half handful. You'll get the hang of it. Play around and dress it up the way you like it. This may not be art but its not paint-by-numbers either. Keep stirring. If you dont see any oil in the pan at all and the sounds are making you think steam more than sizzle, then go on and add another tablespoon of oil. It helps the cooking stay even. Keep stirring. This wont take but a minute; two at the most. Add your chicken, snow peas, and any canned vegetables you may have aquired. Continue stirring for maybe another minute. The vegetables should not necessarily be browning or caramelizing, but by now they should be beginning to lose their raw appearance. So add your noodles. Now I can give you a loose rule about the noods. Look in your wok, guess-timate how much of a mass you have in there, and add the same amount of noodles to that. Making the lo mein dish to be comprised of half noodles. Give that a couple of good tosses or go at it with a couple of spoons. Just toss it together. Then add your sauce, a little at a time, until the stir fry is well coated but not drenched. I dont want you to think sauced so much as dressed, like a salad. Where theres just enough to coat, and yet it carries the full force of the flavor with it. It may take a hit, temperature wise, depending on how hot your sauce was, but once it returns to a boil or sizzle it's ready; so turn it out quickly but carefully into your serving dish. Top with chow mein noodles if you want........naaahh.

***End Note***

--Now its good for prevention of tongue burning, and for juice retention(with steaks, chops, etc) to give your food a minute or three to rest and cool out a little. Go ahead and give that a try, but I doubt you'll be able to pull it off. So burn your mouth and enjoy it! Let me know if anybody tries this. I wanna know how well you did......and why you didnt bring me some.